Friday, July 24, 2009

Waxing not-so-nostalgic

There are many traits I would love for my daughter to inherit from her parents. Athletic ability, musicality, acne-free skin and math smarts are all on the list. However, if there is one thing I hope she is spared, it's this:

My eyebrows.

My thick, unruly, "Oh, you waxed me? Let me sprout back forth in record time!" eyebrows.

I went to get an eyebrow wax today, and while I was having hot wax slathered and then ripped off my face, I reflected back on my long and illustrious eyebrow-waxing history. Some fun facts:

--I've been regularly waxing my brows since high school. If you figure I've averaged a wax a month since then (more frequently these days, less so in college when my very limited disposable income was more likely to go towards beer and *gasp* fake tanning), that's 192 delightful dates on the waxing table. So, I've probably spent somewhere around $3K getting hair ripped off my face.

--I play a little game of over/under each time I go in. How long will it take the waxer to say "My, what thick eyebrows you have!" or some variation thereof? It's not a question of if. It always happens. My favorite variation: "Your eyebrows are like tree trunks!" No shit!

--It is a big, giant, liar-liar-pants-on-fire myth that waxing hurts less the more you do it. If anything, it hurts MORE. Particularly when a cocktail of IVF drugs is running through your veins. (Hey, I may be infertile, but I wasn't about to add the indignity of a unibrow to my list of woes.)

I know, I know, I should be happy that I'll never have to use an eyebrow pencil to draw brows on. And the thick eyebrows come with nice things like thick hair (which, unfortunately, grows EVERYWHERE and creates a variety of other grooming dilemmas). But I hope that 16 years from now, I'm not giving my daughter the old "Oh, honey, it won't hurt at all after the first time" line. At least not about waxing!

The upside of the day is that I did get myself a fine pedicure, the results of which can be seen at right. So it wasn't all bad.

Now excuse me while I go put a bag of frozen peas on my throbbing forehead.


Kate said...

Ohhh pretty pink toes
and OH you made me laugh with the waxing stories. Phew yeah and wow.
really? not sure what to say except thanks for making me laugh, that was a great thing.


Kristin said...

Oooooh...its been so long since I've had a pedicure. Your pedi looks fab!

Um...tha waxing really sounds like it sucks. Have you thought about getting the hair laser removed?

Anonymous said...

I get my eye brows waxed. I cringe at the cost each time I get it done.

Stopping by for an ICLW visit...
No. 95: The Unfair Struggle (male-factor infertility, good friends, neighborhood rumblings)

IF Optimist, then... said...

I've found that I like threading more than waxing. Don't know if you would prefer it. I do indeed love the new toes picture. Very nice.

hope4joy said...

I also feel your pain about the waxing. The cost is crazy these days. I also got a pedi today. There really is nothing like it. Cute sandals.

Beautiful Mess said...

Happy ICLW!

Pretty toes!

I'm horrible at waxing my eye brows. Mine are thick, as well. I should be better about it but I HATE doing it. It HURTS and makes my eyes water! My friend finally told me she's in charge of my eye brows. I told her, go for it! I hate doing it, might as well let someone else do it for FREE! Sort of, I just have to buy the wax.

Congrats on a baby girl! I loved your post below about the locker room. She will love you! Even at 12. Mine still does ;o)
*HUGS* said...

I save all the money on waxing...God gave me a desert there! :-)


Michele said...

ugh... waxing... my husband cringes at the very thought! the things we women do to be pretty!