Sunday, March 6, 2011

Using birth control un-ironically

So, one of the interesting decisions we've had to make in the midst of our current family drama is the decision to table for one year any discussions about or efforts towards having another kid. I say "interesting" rather than "awful" because it unexpectedly felt really good to be open and honest about the fact that we are not in a position to bring another person into this family right now. This past month has made me see what being a single parent would look like, and while I'm hoping that won't become the permanent state of things, I just can't stomach the idea of bringing (or trying to bring -- let's not get ahead of ourselves here) another innocent bystander into the current chaos.

Also "interesting" is the way my thinking has changed on the whole age thing -- 6 months ago I was panicked about turning 35 and OMG I need to get pregnant again right now, but the Perspective Fairy seems to have visited me during some night recently and I'm a little more sanguine about the whole thing. Sure, it would be better from a biological standpoint to get the baby party started sooner rather than later, but I've been around the infertility blogosphere enough to know that I could still have a few good years/eggs left in me. Or I could not. Either way, it's out of my hands and I'm at peace with that at this particular moment.


So, we're back to using birth control. Not in the ironic suppression-before-IVF way, but in the actual, hey, sex can make babies and we don't want one of those right now way.

How unexpected is that?

7 comments:

manymanymoons said...

Sounds like the responsible thing to do. Good for you for taking that step. I hope things are looking up (whatever that ultimately means for you and your family).

manymanymoons said...

Sounds like the responsible thing to do. Good for you for taking that step. I hope things are looking up (whatever that ultimately means for you and your family).

Amber said...

So glad you're at peace with it. It sounds like you have other things that are more important to deal with right now. Hope everything works out just the way you want.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I are able to get along (for the most part) and I STILL dont think it is wise to bring another baby into our family! Lol...

One is stressful enough for us!

Sounds like you made a very adult and wise decision! Unlike many people out there who pop out babies no matter what the circumstances and the kids end up paying the high price of choices.

Hang in there Momma! I'll be praying for you!

xoxo

Tracy said...

Sounds like you made the right decision for your family during this difficult time. I hope everything works out the way you would like. You are in my thoughts & prayers.

<3

Anonymous said...

I can't remember those days of birth control! I'm praying things get better and your family gets stronger.

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